Giving Thanks Patrick Style

After 25 years this was the first Thanksgiving I’ve spent without my parents.

It was bit different but ultimately I was with my handsome hubby. We both ran out of vacation time due to our excellent honeymoon.

Our Thanksgiving ended up only us for Patrick Thanksgiving 1.0. It was KP, me and the pups in our new home – relaxing, amazing, and super chill for a holiday that usually has us immersed with family and close friends.

In the past my Thanksgiving began with a run to Starbucks to get lattes and Cranberry Bliss bars with my mom and sister. Then we watch the Macy’s Day parade before Mom begins to cook while Mandy and I lay around in front of the TV watching cute puppies on the National Dog Show. Later we would sit down to our Thanksgiving dinner, stuff ourselves, and then laze around our house for the remainder of the day.

This Thanksgiving was pretty much the same. My awesome hubby took me to Starbucks, we then made fun of the parade cheesy-ness, and later both started preparing our Turkey Feast. Between the two of us we could run Julie and Andy Hagenbush’s concept of a year-round Thanksgiving restaurant.

After KP passed out following our Thanksgiving indulgence, I retreated to my office to work on some blog entries for this week. For inspiration I re-read a column I wrote for The Red & Black about the Thanksgiving traditions I valued as a 20-year old. Five years later things have changed a bit.

The highest virtues in my heart are still love, beauty, truth and freedom. After getting married I believe in those values more than anything else in our world.

Honestly, the only thing that has truly changed is my perception on how work impacts life.

In college we were a bit jaded. Professors and advisors who scared us about the realities of the “real” world lead us to believe we had to obtain sustainable, financially advantageous jobs immediately following college. (Sighs) but this is definitely not the case.

I could have taken bolder risks with my journalism career instead of chasing after a job that would give me a comfortable life. I’m thankful for finding a job that offers both self-satisfaction and a decent income. I realize I’m absolutely privileged in today’s society to be in such a position. This post is about Thanksgiving, right?

What’s frustrating is how we were taught as a society to believe happiness in our jobs equates to blissful lives. A job is a job. What we often forget to remember we can make money any which way.

For the remainder of 2010, I’m going to continue to work hard at my job and continue to explore other avenues of “work” that provide me with bliss. This blog is one medium, my novel is another, and there may even be a short story or two along the way. Ultimately I’d love to make a career out of writing, and one that actually can support my family.

For now, I’m incredible thankful for the life we live. Patrick 1.0 Thanksgiving was awesome. I’m so excited to see where we’re at this time next year.

The First Patrick Thanksgiving

Was awesome.

Champion for Kelli's Cause

Granted times are tough in our current economic recovery. We’ve penny-pinched, skipped out on eating at a fancy restaurant, or opted for buying a more practical car.

We all made choices in the interest of protecting our financial well-being.

It’s been a learning experience trying to balance my personal checkbook in order to meet our mortgage, car note, cell phone, grocery, gas and other bills as a 25-year old. I am so incredibly thankful I had parents who not only supported me through college but also taught me how to properly make ends meet (and now an amazing husband to help me learn even more).

There was a particular article that caught my attention today on Gawker.

http://gawker.com/5696300/what-200000-in-student-debt-looks-like

This story is about a fellow 20-something with more than $200,000 in student debt. That’s 200,000 Wendy’s Frostys, thousands of purses, or 10,000 pairs of 7 Jeans in debt! That’s 20,000 martinis, weeks’ worth of eating out, or a full year of residence at the Four Seasons!

It doesn’t take a financial genius to realize $200,000 is a lot of money. Unfortunately this poor girl didn’t realize what her total bill would sum up to when she signed up for her student loans.

Her name is Kelli Space. She’s 23, was the first person from her family to go to college and chose the prestigious Northwestern University. However, now she’s a graphic designer with more than $890 to pay each month towards her debt. Kelli is living at home with her parents because she can’t make ends meet, and in November 2011 her monthly debt payment will almost double to $1,600 a month!

Kelli has started a website in the interest of her own financial well being.

http://twohundredthou.com/about

To date she’s already raised $793 toward paying off her debt. I donated $10 to poor Kelli because if I lived where she did the least I would do is buy the poor girl a drink! Now she can take the $10 to either pay off her debt or buy a welfare martini.

The amount of debt Kelli accrued is unconscionable. No young person in America who chose to get a college degree (albeit from one of America’s top institutions) should be punished for not choosing a career that would make her enough money to get her out of debt. It’s the ridiculous interest that has put her in this unfortunate position.

Kelli chose a profession that would make her happy instead of being miserable in an office for 14-hour days, and now she’s literally paying for it.

If you can spare the cash in these tight times, throw a dollar at Kelli. Help give her the chance to get her young life back.

Much Love to Kate & Will

Dear Miss Middleton & Your Royal Highness

Congratulations on your forthcoming marriage. From one joyful newlywed to another blissful couple, the world of engagement is a wonderful place.

The next few months preparing for your wedding are going to be exciting and stressful. As crazy as our planning process was I can’t fathom having to plan the wedding of the century.

What has become quite apparent after watching the media coverage of your engagement is that y’all (that’s you plural here in Atlanta) are deliriously in love.

Personally I could not put up with the insane barrage of news outlets scrambling to capture every detail of my engagement and wedding planning.  You two have handled it with grace and impeccable taste.

Bravo, Kate & William – nicely done thus far.

Although we’ve never met, though I hope one day our paths will cross, I feel all newlyweds in the world have one commonality: passion.

We are living solely for the other person, hoping our fresh marriages can truly triumph over all obstacles. Our passion for our partner is what we look forward to coming home from work, waking up to in the morning, and falling asleep to at night.

 “But Willy and Katy look like they are genuinely in love and that's all I look for. That's what being a human being is all about. That is what is important in life.”

This quote is from one of my musical idols John Lydon (a.k.a. Johnny Rotten from the Sex Pistols) in a great editorial he wrote for The Sun.

Johnny is right: being genuinely in love is what’s important in life. Screw social hierarchy, financial security and its misgivings, in a world so petrified of terrorist attacks.

If we can experience genuine love and share its positive lightness with the world, then there are no problems. There is nothing to fear in the world of marital bliss. What a lovely thought.

To quote Johnny again:

“Ultimately they are in love. And love is not a problem. In fact, it is a way out of most problems.”

Y’all have made it eight years together. The next few months are going to be a piece of wedding cake.  

Best wishes and hope we meet soon,

Mrs. Lauren Patrick

Mr. Claude Bridges

Our dear friend Hamilton Bridges lost his father yesterday.

It’s been a blessing getting to know Hamilton over the past two years. He and his fabulous wife MaryAnn quickly became two of my favorite people in Atlanta. The most frustrating fact is that there really isn’t anything we can do to help our friends except to be there to comfort, support and pray for them.

Mr. Claude Bridges passed away after fighting a courageous battle against one of the worst diseases known to mankind. He was truly an inspiration even suffering from this wretched thing. Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (abbreviated ALS and a.k.a. Lou Gehrig's disease) is a progressive, fatal neurodegenerative disease. It starts with losing muscle control in one part of the body (part of an arm, leg, or even trouble swallowing or breathing) and continues to spread throughout the entire body.

Steven Hawking is one of the most famous living survivors of ALS. Unfortunately Mr. Bridges wasn’t as lucky as Hawking. Most ALS patients pass away within three-to-five years of diagnosis. 

Sadly I only met Mr. Bridges a handful of times; however, regardless of his circumstance, Mr. Bridges always had a smile on his face. Maybe Mr. Bridges was able to stay so positive because of his faith. I didn’t know him well enough to say. What I do know is that at MaryAnn and Hamilton’s engagement party Mr. Bridges made a toast to the couple that I will never forget.

He was able to toast to his son and new fiancée with the assistance of a computer (way cooler than Steven Hawking because a) it was Mr. Bridges and b) because it was at a fantastic party). You can see the full video captured of the toast here http://vimeo.com/7015220  (thanks to my hubby)

Please take a moment to read the wonderful words Mr. Bridges had to say about Hamilton and MaryAnn’s marriage:

“It is both heartwarming and exciting to gather here tonight with family and so many friends to celebrate the engagement of MaryAnn and Hamilton… Many of you know that Berney and I have strongly encouraged our children to wait until 30 to get married. Hamilton’s two older sisters complied.

We have said that Hamilton being the baby always got special treatment. When he met MaryAnn he knew a good thing when he saw it. After getting to know MaryAnn – Tracey, Mom and I all agree that it’s okay for Hamilton to break that rule.

We would like to welcome MaryAnn, and her parents Babs and Bob Barrett into our family. I hope you have met the Barrett’s this evening. In addition to her parents, MaryAnn’s sister, Karen, and her husband, Ted, are with us tonight.

Thank you Babs and Bob for sharing your delightful daughter with us. We look forward to sharing many more happy occasions with you.”

How incredible. Mr. Bridges didn’t mention anything about his precarious health but chose to focus on how excited he and his family were to welcome MaryAnn. What a wonderful moment for both families which friends were privileged to witness.

As I’m completely helpless to really do anything in this tragic situation, I decided to read up more on ALS and Lou Gehrig’s personal fight. For those as ignorant as I was, Lou Gehrig brought this disease to national attention when he retired from Major League Baseball in 1939. Lou Gehrig held the longest streak for 2,130 consecutive games played over 14 years until broken by Cal Ripken, Jr. 

Lou's last game was played with the New York Yankees in 1939 when he famously told his coach "I'm benching myself, Joe," saying he was doing so "for the good of the team."

After reading of Lou Gehrig’s Wikipedia entry (available here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lou_Gehrig) it became clear that there was a common thread shared by Lou Gehrig and Claude Bridges. The passion both men had for their families.

In reading Lou’s farewell speech that he delivered on his retirement day he said he considered himself “the luckiest man on the face of this earth.” He went on to say:

“When you have a wonderful mother-in-law who takes sides with you in squabbles with her own daughter — that's something. When you have a father and a mother who work all their lives so that you can have an education and build your body — it's a blessing. When you have a wife who has been a tower of strength and shown more courage than you dreamed existed — that's the finest I know.

So I close in saying that I might have been given a bad break, but I've got an awful lot to live for. Thank you.”

As little as I knew about Mr. Bridges, I know, like Lou, he really did have a lot to live for.

It’s a blessing that Mr. Bridges is not suffering anymore, and I’m thankful for the few moments I had with this amazing man.

Hamilton and MaryAnn, I love you both and am so sorry for your loss.

To read more about Mr. Bridges wonderful life please visit: http://www.southcarecremation.com/obituaries/obituary.php?id=805

Have a lucky and loving day.

TSA = Totally Slacking Administration

On Tuesday, Gizmodo published a story regarding the first body scans leaked by the TSA in Florida.

http://gizmodo.com/5690749/these-are-the-first-100-leaked-body-scans

This administration completely and utterly slacked off if they allowed any other government agency (let alone a blog) obtain images from what American citizens believed to be private documentation.

So much for the Fourth Amendment and in case you need a reminder, the Fourth Amendment is part of the Bill of Rights in our Constitution. The Fourth Amendment guards against unreasonable searches and seizures. It was adopted as a response to the abuse of the writ of assistance, which is a type of general search warrant, in the American Revolution.

We have to ask ourselves: at what point do these body scans become an unreasonable search?

(Sighs) unfortunately, I have had such an encounter with the TSA. When we were coming back from our honeymoon last month I had to go through one of these scanners. I was wearing tight jeans, an even tighter t-shirt, and sandals. Granted I was still in honeymoon mode and my outfit left very little to the imagination.

However, after stepping through this scanner, a female TSA agent still ran her gloved hand over my clothing. There was absolutely no way I could have a bomb or any sort of terroristic device on my scantily-clad person. One could argue that this search was unreasonable.

Life as we know it was changed forever on September 11, 2001, but it’s been almost a decade and at some point our government needs to start applying common sense and practical reasoning to its security practices at airports. Airlines themselves are hurting economically and unless the government can make airline travel an enjoyable experience again the airlines will only continue to plummet into a downward spiral.

Can we have a revolution? One Blogger, "Johnny Edge" was daring enough to refuse both the TSA body scanner and pat-down, left the terminal to head home, and then was threatened with a $10,000 fine by a TSA official.

http://gawker.com/5689925/man-threatened-with-10000-fine-after-refusing-tsa-grope

If anything, this proves that the TSA not only lacks clear standards but (like most government agencies) operates completely inefficiently.

(Sigh again) at this point, there's nothing I can do except refuse to fly. In journalism school we were taught to cry "foul" on behalf of the American public, a right bestowed by the First Amendment. Why isn't the national press calling foul on the TSA? No one owns pitchforks anymore so we can't crowd the streets in angry masses, pitchforks flying, and demand justice. But the press needs to use the right of the First Amendment. Newspapers, magazines, broadcast stations, radio networks, websites, bloggers - unite!

Someone, anyone, everyone, call foul on the unreasonable searches of the TSA!

Doing the Right Thing

There are moments in life where the Right Thing is staring you down and you ignore it. Perhaps it’s out of fear, or the fact is ignorance is bliss, but sometimes when the Right Thing is gazing at you, hoping you’ll notice its presence, you have the opportunity to embrace the Right Thing, and yet you shun the chance.

Last night I was heading into my neighborhood grocery store to pick up dinner. My husband and I both had another crazy Monday at the office so I was going to pick up something tasty for our supper.

As I walked across the parking lot I noticed an older man sitting on a bench outside the grocery store. I had seen him there last week except that day he was there in the afternoon. His clothes were old and gray, his long beard growing out several inches from his elderly chin. He looked exactly the same as when I’d seen him days before.

Instead of politely saying “hello” or “good evening” I averted my gaze as I continued into the grocery store. Out of the corner of my eye I could see the man clutching a cup of Starbucks. He had the same coffee cup when I’d seen him the other day. As a fellow Starbucks fan I hoped that it wasn’t the same cup, or that the Starbucks in the grocery store was kind enough to give him a refill.

The Right Thing would have said “ask him if he needs help?” I could have stopped, smiled, and asked if I could buy him a sandwich. Instead I ignored the chance to help this man. Possibly it was out of fear (Mother always said don’t talk to strangers). Whatever it was I didn’t have the courage to just approach the man to find out if there was anything I could do to help him.

The grocery store clerk inside confirmed my assumption that he was a beggar. I didn’t ask anything else, just nodded my head and continued shopping. It was hard as I walked around the store collecting items for our meal to get the vision of the man out of my head. As I moved into the bakery section I noticed fresh loaves of bread were on sale for $1.99. I picked up two, one for our family, and one to offer to the Starbucks fan when I went back outside.

How many times do we turn away from someone instead of asking if they need help? Why can we not walk up to the Right Thing, hug it for all its goodness, and make the world a better place?

Why is doing the Right Thing so damn hard?

My logic in picking up the extra loaf of bread was totally bunk. After paying for our food I went back outside and the man was gone. I looked across the parking lot but there was no sign of him. I had the loaf of bread in my hand, and caught another store clerk inside kindly looking at me from the other side of the store window. He nodded, and I nodded back.

The Catholic inside me said “leave it, someone will take it, and maybe he’ll come back?” So I left the bread on the bench, thinking of it like communion at an altar. I realize now that really was just years of Catholic guilt manifesting in a silly action.

Now after thinking back to the whole experience I truly feel quite foolish. It was so inefficient not to offer help in the first place and just leave food sitting on a bench. My positive side says “maybe someone else who was hungry took it.” But I’ll never know.

What I do know is the next time I go to a grocery store, and see someone sitting outside that needs a break, I’m going to embrace the Right Thing. Whether it’s a Boy Scout selling popcorn, a Girl Scout troop with cookies, the Salvation Army ringing a bell for spare change, or my friend the fellow Starbucks lover.

In the coming holiday season we all have the opportunity to show a little love to the Right Thing. We ignore doing the Right Thing a lot of times during the year. This is the one season that embraces good will toward all.

My sincerest hope is that next time you stumble across the Right Thing in the coming weeks you can make a positive difference. Have a great day everybody.

Doing the Right Thing

There are moments in life where the Right Thing is staring you down and you ignore it. Perhaps it’s out of fear, or the fact is ignorance is bliss, but sometimes when the Right Thing is gazing at you, hoping you’ll notice its presence, you have the opportunity to embrace the Right Thing, and yet you shun the chance.

Last night I was heading into my neighborhood grocery store to pick up dinner. My husband and I were both had another crazy Monday at the office so I was going to pick up something tasty for our supper.

As I walked across the parking lot I noticed an older man sitting on a bench outside the grocery store. I had seen him there last week except that day he was there in the afternoon. His clothes were old and gray, his long beard growing out several inches from his elderly chin. He looked exactly the same as when I’d seen him days before.

Instead of politely saying “hello” or “good evening” I averted my gaze as I continued into the grocery store. Out of the corner of my eye I could see the man clutching a cup of Starbucks. He had the same coffee cup when I’d seen him the other day. As a fellow Starbucks fan I hoped that it wasn’t the same cup, or that the Starbucks in the grocery store was kind enough to give him a refill.

The Right Thing would have said “ask him if he needs help?” I could have stopped, smiled, and asked if I could buy him a sandwich. Instead I ignored the chance to help this man. Possibly it was out of fear (Mother always said don’t talk to strangers). Whatever it was I didn’t have the courage to just approach the man to find out if there was anything I could do to help him.

The grocery store clerk inside confirmed my assumption that he was a beggar. I didn’t ask anything else, just nodded my head and continued shopping. It was hard as I walked around the store collecting items for our meal to get the vision of the man out of my head. As I moved into the bakery section I noticed fresh loaves of bread were on sale for $1.99. I picked up two, one for our family, and one to offer to the Starbucks fan when I went back outside.

How many times do we turn away from someone instead of asking if they need help? Why can we not walk up to the Right Thing, hug it for all its goodness, and make the world a better place?

Why is doing the Right Thing so damn hard?

My logic in picking up the extra loaf of bread was totally bunk. After paying for our food I went back outside and the man was gone. I looked across the parking lot but there was no sign of him. I had the loaf of bread in my hand, and caught another store clerk inside kindly looking at me from the other side of the store window. He nodded, and I nodded back.

The Catholic inside me said “leave it, someone will take it, and maybe he’ll come back?” So I left the bread on the bench, thinking of it like communion at an altar. I realize now that really was just years of Catholic guilt manifesting in a silly action.

Now after thinking back to the whole experience I truly feel quite foolish. It was so inefficient not to offer help in the first place and just leave food sitting on a bench. My positive side says “maybe someone else who was hungry took it.” But I’ll never know.

What I do know is the next time I go to a grocery store, and see someone sitting outside that needs a break, I’m going to embrace the Right Thing. Whether it’s a Boy Scout selling popcorn, a Girl Scout troop with cookies, the Salvation Army ringing a bell for spare change, or my friend the fellow Starbucks lover.

In the coming holiday season we all have the opportunity to show a little love to the Right Thing. We ignore doing the Right Thing a lot of times during the year. This is the one season that embraces good will toward all.

My sincerest hope is that next time you stumble across the Right Thing in the coming weeks you can make a positive difference. Have a great day everybody. 

Chapter 1 - the beginning

It's official! I, the newly-minted Lauren Patrick, have started my very first blog. With the utmost sincerity I hope to update this blog every day with articles, reviews, and excerpts from my first novel.

As the wedding craziness has finally settled I've finally had the chance to get back to my true passion: writing. My dear husband has encouraged me to keep up with my pledge to write 175 pages by the end of November. So far I've got more than 100 pages of content, with Chapter 1 at 39 pages and ready for editorial review.

This week I'll start posting excerpts from the novel for you, dear reader, to critique, praise, bash, or whatever have you in the interest of making this novel the multi-million dollar franchise I believe it can become.

For now, I'd like to start by writing what has to be one of the funniest text conversations I've ever had. This conversation took place between myself and former colleague PT this past Saturday. I was at a wedding, and PT was at home with our mutual friend Alec Wooden watching the Georgia @ Auburn game.

As a true SEC football fan I never would have gotten married on a Saturday during football season; which is why husband and I wed on a Sunday. Thankfully, we have wonderful technology that allows one to get sports updates while in a church (sorry Jesus, but you love Bulldog football too).

Editor's note: This conversation does include profanity that was kept in for the purpose of protecting the author's original intent, and for the sake of posterity.

PT: Where are you watching the game today?
Lauren Patrick: Nowhere. Heading to Charlotte. You?
PT: Watching it at my place with Alec Wooden.
Lauren Patrick: Fun times. How's life?
PT: Life is busy as usual. Got into it with Emily a few nights ago and finally got to have insane make up sex last night.
PT: What's in Charlotte?
Lauren Patrick: Glad you made nice with Emily. Please tell Alec I said nice job with Insite magazine. We're going to a wedding in Charlotte.
PT: He and I will probably be roommates next year.
Lauren Patrick: Cool. Can you text me updates on the game since we'll be at the wedding?
PT: Haha, sure thing.
At about 4 p.m. when I was heading to the wedding and needing a game update:
Lauren Patrick: How's it going?
PT: Still a lot of game left but damn we look good
PT: 21-14
PT: Still 21-14. Georgia's ball. 7:30 left in the second quarter
PT: 21-21. 00:51 left before halftime. Dawgs receive after.
Lauren Patrick: This is why we got married on a Sunday during football season.
PT: Haha one of the many reasons I love you. Alec is flipping out. Wish you and KP could be here. It's a riot.
PT: Got fucked by bad calls. 21-28. God dammit.
PT: Touchdooooown Georgia! 28-28!
PT: 28-35. My heart can't take this.
PT: 31-35
PT: 31-42. FUUUUUUCK!
PT: 2:50 left. Auburn on the goal line. 31-42. Damn near impossible to win but unranked vs. #2, we played our hearts out.
Lauren Patrick: Tomorrow i am writing down all these texts and documenting them as the epitmoe of how to experience the heartbreak of an SEC game. Thanks for the great sports writing.
PT: Haha. Hope you guys are having fun. Can't wait for next weekend. Let me know if/where you and kp plan to stay. Haven't picked a hotel myself.
Lauren Patrick: Here's our predicament, it's Mandy's birthday next weekend so we need to be with her and she's coming home to Atlanta.
PT: Do what you gotta do. I understand.
Lauren Patrick: We love you PT!
PT: I love you guys too. Tell KP I wish Tech the best of luck. We'll see which UGA team shows up to play. Lost today but I'm still proud of how well we held our own against a truly great team.